Friday, May 11, 2012

I Love U Papa

Main college ke final year mein thi. Hamaari class college ke ek education tour ppar jaa rahi thi. Hum sab friends  bahut khus they.  Main  bahut utsahit thi. Aisa pahli baar tha jab main apne doston ke saath kahin bahar jaane wali thi. Par ghar se permission Milna bada muskil kaam tha. Main apne ma-papa ki eklaut beti hoon. Isliye mera bada khyal rakha jaata hai. Aur ye ek wajah thi ki mujhe ghar se itni door akele jaane ki parmission nahi milne wali thi. Lekin main har pal koshish kar rahi thi ki mujhe jaane ki permission mil jaaye.
Isliye alag-alag daleelen pesh kar rahi thi. Maine maa se kaha ki bahar jaoongi toh jyada exposure milega. Class mein study karne se aur field experience ka alag-alag experience hota hai. Bahar jakar doosre students bhi interaction hota hai. Iss se unke vichar bhi jaan ne ko milete hain aur kis ke saath kaise tackle kiya jaaye ye bhi seekh sakte hain. Fir kal mujhe higher studies ke liye bahar jaana padega toh kya aap log mere saath jaaoge.
 Jana thoda isliye bhi muskil lag raha tha kyonki papa ghar par nahi they woh office ke kisi kaam ke silsile mein bahar gaye hue they. Aakhir kaar maa ne kaha ki papa ki permission lo  woh agar haan kar de toh chali jaana. Waise toh papa meri koi baat nahi taalte par kyon ki ghar se door kisi dusre state mein jaana tha isliye chances kam lag rahe they fir bhi saamne hote toh unhe emotional blackmail karke mana sakti thi par phone par woh bhi possible nahi tha.
Aakhirkaar woh din aa gaya. Jab hamen nikalna tha. Papa se phone par baat nahi ho paai. Maine apni do friends ko ghar par bula liya tha ab woh bhi mere saath maa ki khusamad karne lagi. Ki aunty allow kar dijiye na hum bhi toh jaa rahen hain. Hum Maithili ka khyal rakhenge aur roj shaam ko aapko  phone karenge. Uncle ghar par nahi hain. Aap hi ijaajat de dijiye. Hum total 50 students bengalore ja rahe hain. Saath mein paanch lecturer bhi hain. Ab hum koi bachche thode hi hain. Aur fir bahut request karne ke baad maa ne permission de di woh boli lekin ab itna samay kahan hai ki saari packing waigairh ho sake toh unhone kaha ki chinta mat kijiye aunty Maithili ne packing pahle se kar rakhi hai.
Maine khushi-khushi apne college friends ke saath bengalore ke liye nikal padi. 20 din ka tour tha. Jismein hamen kuch seminars attend karne they kuch workshops honi thi. Kuch lectures aur fir bengalore ke chaar-paanch college students ke saath interactions aur joint workshops. 50 student ke group mein 25 ladke aur 25 ladkiyaan thi. Raaste bhar hum antakshari khelte hue gaane gaate hue jaa  rahe they. Hum bahut enjoy kar rahe they.
Ghar se door sabhi aajaad panchi they. Khub hansi-majaak kar rahe they. Har kisi ke naye-naye roop hamen dekhne ko mil rahe they. Iss hansi-majaak ke dauraan hum mein se kaafi ladke- ladkiyaan ek-doosre pasand karne lage they aur ek-doosre ke kaafi najdeek aa gaye they. Aisa hi kuch haal mera bhi tha. Mere bhi  jaise pankh lag gaye they Aur main khule aasmaan mein ud rahi thi. Pahle kabhi itni aajaadi nahi mili thi. Meri khusi chupaay nahi chup rahi thi. Main har activity mein bad-chad kar bhag le rahi thi. Group ke sabhi students bade hairaan they ki ye Maithili jo kaafi reserve nature ki thi isko kya ho gaya hai. Mera ye roop kisi ne nahi dekha tha.
Aajadi ka fayda thoda bahut sabhi ne uthaya tha. Mujhe bhi iss trip mein ek ladka mihir bahut achcha lagne laga tha. Woh ladkon ke group ka leader tha. Uske baat karne ka tarika, sabko samjhana ke tarika bahut hi achcha tha. Usmein  sabko ek decision ke liye tyar karne ki kala thi. In short uske ander leadership quality bahut achchi thi.
Main sabse chup ka usko dekha karti thi. Mujhe aisa lag raha tha. Jaise woh bhi mujhse kuch kahna chahta ho. Par jab bhi hum ek-doosre ke saamne aate they toh kuch kah nahi paate they. Bas ek-doosre ko smile paas kar dete they. Kul milakar mere bilkul alag se they. Apni 18 saal ki jindagi mein aisa pahle kabhi nahi feel kiya tha. Main badi khus thi. Tabhi meri jindagi mein aisa kuch hua jis se mere pairon tele jameen khisak gayi.
Hamaara bengalore ke kisi college ke students ke saath joint workshop tha. Hamen do-do ke group mein baat diya tha. Ek student unka aur ek student hamaara. Hum unke college mein pahunche jahan notice board par hum logon ke naam aur hamaare   partner ka naam likha tha. College mein pahunchte hi mujhe bada ajeeb sa lag raha tha. Jaise ki wahan har koi mujhe jaanta ho. Jo koi bhi milta smile paas karta ya wish karta tha. Koi ghur kar dekhta toh koi hairaani se. Kuch der baad comments bhi milne lage. Erre western outfits, bahut achchi lag rahi ho, What a change, Wow! Nice, looking smart sabse jyada hairaan tab hui jab ek ladke ne kaha wow! Miss Nautiyal, ye outfit tumhe bahut suit karta hai. Ye sunkar toh main haairaan hi rah gayi ki mere surname se toh mere dost bhi mujhe nahi jaante fir ise kaise pata chala.
Iss se pahle ki main kuch poochti woh chala gaya. Meri friends bhi mujhe dekh kar hairaan thi. Kya baat hai yahan toh sab tujh ko jaante hain. Kya yahan tum pahle aa chuki ho. Maine kaha nahi yaar pata nahi ye sab loga aise kyon behave kar rahe hain. Pata nahi.  Itne mein hum notice board ke paas pahunch gaye. Notice board par apni partner ka naam dekha toh dang rah gayi. Wahan likha tha Vedehi nautiyal aur mathili nautiyal.  Dekhte hi muh se nikla Vedehi nautiyaal yahan kaun si nautiyaal aa gayi. Itne mein peeche se awaj aai main aai nahi hoon main pahle se yahan thi aai toh tum ho.
Peeche mud kar dekha toh hosh ud gaye. Aisa laga jaise ki apne aap ko aaine mein dekh rahi hoon. Lekin Indian outfit ye toh main kabhi pahanti nahi hoon.  Woh bhi mujhe dekhkar hakki-bakki rah gayi. Aur uske baad woh sabhi log jinhone bhi hamen saath-saath dekha dekhte hi rah gaye. Vedehi ko dekhte hi mujhe papa ki baat yaad aai woh kahte they ki agar meri do batiyaan hoti toh doosri ka naam main Vedehi rakhta. Maine Vedehi ka haath pakda aur use akele mein le gayi taaki use ke saath baat kar sakun. Maine us se poocha ki tumhaare papa ka naam kya hai.  Woh boli manish nautiyaal. Ye sunkar mujhe chakkar aane laga. Vedehi ne mujhe sahara diya aur boli kyon kya hua? Maine  kaha ki mere papa ka naam bhi manish nautiyaal hai.
Hum dono ki shaklen milti hain aur  humaari ek jaisi shaklon ki  wajah se hi  saare log aise behave kar rahe they ki  woh  mujhe pahle se jaante hain. Woh sab mujhe tumhe  samajh rahe they. Vedehi ne bataya ki woh yahin bengalore mein hi paida hui hai aur kabhi yahan se bahar nahi gayi. Papa ka business hai,  mahine mein teen hafte delhi mein rahte hain aur ek hafte yahan bengalore mein.
Maithili boli ki papa service karte hain aur mahine mein teen hafte delhi mein rahte hain aur ek hafta tour par rahte hain. Mera ek bada bhai hai jo mujhse paanch saal bada hai. Vedehi boli hum teen bhai-bahan hain main badi hoon aur mujhse chote do bhai kartik aur kunal twins hain.  Dadi papa ke saath delhi mein rahti hain aur papa ka khyal rakhti hain. Hum dono ko samajh mein nahi aa raha tha ki humen khush hona chahiye tha ya dhukhi, hum roye ya hanse.
Hum wahin baithe kaafi der tak ek-doosre se bahut saari baaten share karte rahe. Aur fir Vedehi mera  haath pakad kar apne saath apne ghar le gayi. Vedehi mujhse saath mahine choti thi. Main chupchap uske saath chalti rahi.  Ghar pahunchkar usne apni maa se kaha ki maa aaj main aapko kisi se milwana chahti hoon. Aur fir achanak mujhe unke aage khada kar diya.  Unhone mujhe thoda hairaani se dekha aur fir gale laga kar boli aao Maithili. Tum yahan kaise sab kuch kushal purvak toh hai.
Mere aur Vedehi ke hosh ud gaye. Ki ye toh sab kuch jaanti hain. Maa, maa tum sab jaanti ho. Haan. Maine poocha aur meri maa kya unhe pata hai. Woh boli nahi woh kuch nahi jaanti, unhe kuch nahi pata. Itna sunte hi main wahan se bahar nikal padi. Auto karke seedhe college pahunchi. Main bahut disturb thi. Mujhe bahut bura lag raha tha. Jaise kisi ne mere saath bahut bada dhoka kiya ho. Lekin fir apni maa ke baare mein soch kar aur bhi bura lagne laga. Ki unke saath toh kitna bada dhoka ho raha hai aur woh bhi itne saalon se.
Maine college pahunchkar apne lecturer se ghar wapas jaane ki permission li. Maine unse kaha ki meri dadi ki tabiyat bahtu kharab hai aur mujhe wapas jaana hai. Lecturer ne akele wapas bhejne  ke liye mana kar diya. Kaha ki  tum akele wapas nahi ja sakti.  Mujhe pareshani mein dekh kar mihir ne mujhe thik-thak ghar pahunchaane ki jimmedari le li. Fir lecturer ne mujhe mihir ke saath wapas bhej diya.
Main apne aap ko sambhal nahi pa rahi thi.  Mere baar-baar aanshu nikal rahe they. Mihir ne mujhe bahut sambhala. Use lag raha tha ki main dadi ki wajah se pareshaan hoon. Par mujhe toh apni maa ki wajah se bura lag raha tha. Mujhe apne papa se nafrat ho rahi thi. Maine Vedehi ke ghar par dadi ki ek family picture dekhi thi isliye mujhe dadi par bhi gussa aa raha tha ki unhe bhi sab kuch pata hai. Maine delhi pahunchkar seedhe dadi se milne ka vichaar banaya.  Aur mihir ko bola ki   tum mujhe mere chacha ke ghar chod do. Mihir ne mujhe mere chacha ke ghar chod diya. Main bade gusse se ander gussi.
Dadi ne kaha aa gayi mathili. Mujhe tumhaari badi chinta ho rahi thi. Oh ho toh aapko phone pahunch gaya ki main bengalore se nikal padi hoon, maine gusse se kaha. Haan Vedehi ka phone aaya tha. Dadi tum sab dhoke baaj ho. Tumhne humen aur meri maa ko bahut bada dhoka diya hai. Tum bahut buri ho aur papa bhi bahut gande hain. Dadi boli ki mathili tum abhi sirf aadha sach jaanti ho. Aur aadha sach jaankar tum faisla nahi kar sakti. Koi bhi rai banane se pahle tum pura sach jaan lo. Abhi tumhe apni maa se hum dardi aur papa se nafrat ho rahi hai.
Jara apne dil par haath rakh kar kaho, iss sach ko jaan ne se pahle kya tumhne apne papa ke pyar mein koi kami dekhi. Kabhi bhi koi aisa pal jab tumhe laga ho ki  tumhaare papa ko tumhaari fikar nahi. Ya fir woh tumhe kisi bhi aur ma-baap se kam pyar karte hon.  Fir rahi baat, tumhari maa ko dhoka dene ki  toh  iss baat ke liye woh  tumhe answerable nahi hai. Iska agar use kabhi bhi jawab dena hoga toh woh jawab dega tumhaari maa ko. Tumhe nahi.
Lekin fir  bhi main tumhe woh sach batati hoon jo ab tak kisi ko nahi pata. Par pahle tum batao ki tumhaare hisaab se tumhare maa aur pitaji ke beech kaise sambandh hain. Maa aur pitaji aapas mein kam baath karte hain. Maa jo kahti hain papa woh chup-chap kar dete hain. Papa jab bhi ghar par hote hain toh ya toh mere saath busy rahte hain ya fir  apni kitaboon mein khoye  rahte hain. Beta ye silsila pichle 20 saal se chal raha hai. Chahne walon se door na chahne walon ke beech mein ek pal  bhi gujarana bada muskil hota hai aur woh pichle 20 saalon se rah raha hai.
Sirf tumhaare karan. Agar woh tum ko itna pyar na karta toh use us narak mein rahne ki koi jaroorat nahi thi. Tumhaare ma-pitaji ki arranged marriage hui thi. Main hi tumhaari maa ko iss ghar mein dulhan banakar laai thi. Shaadi ke dedh saal tak sab thik chala. Par uske baad unki shaadi suda jindagi mein anban shuru ho gayi.  Tumhaare dadaji ki akasmaat mrityu ke baad saare ghar ki jimmedaari tumhaare papa ke kandho par aa gayi. Us bure waqt mein tumhaari maa ne uska saath dene ki bajay us ki muskiloon ko aur bada diya.
Woh baharwalon ke bahkawe mein aakar ghar mein kalesh karne lagi. Woh nahi  chahti thi ki tumhaare papa kisi bhi doosri jimmedaari ko uthaye. Uska ka maan na tha ki tere papa uska haq maar kar baaki logon ko de rahe hain. Jabki tumhaare papa apni jimedariyon ko nibha raha tha. Tere maa ek joint family mein nahi rahna chahti thi. Isliye ghar mein roj kisi na kisi baat par tere papa se jhagda karti thi. Woh bahut koshish karta ki woh tumhaari maa ko khus rakh sake par uski saari koshishen bekar jaati.
Jab tere papa bahut pareshan rahne lage toh maine hi tere papa ko alag rahne ke liye kaha. Aur woh tere maa ko lekar alag flat par chala gaya. Tere papa alag toh chale gaye par unka dil tut gaya. Teri maa alag jaane ke baad bhi shaant nahi hui. Woh har pal ye koshish karti ki tumhaare papa hum se saare rishte tod len. Tumhaari maa ko lagta tha kit ere papa uske liye sahi match nahi hain unhe tumhare papa se koi bahut achcha mil sakta tha. Woh hamesha apni kismet ko kosti rahti thi. Ki uske shaadi tere papa se ho gayi. Woh har kaam apne marji se kiya karti thi aur tere papa se kabhi bhi koi salah mashwara nahi karti thi
Usko  sab ne ye salah di ki agar uski life mein ek bachcha aa jaaye toh us ki life se jhagde khatam ho jaayenge aur dono ki life ko ek alag direction mil jaayegi aur bachacha dono ki life mein khushiyan le aayega.. Par tumhaari maa koi bhi responsibility lene ko tyar nahi thi. Dheere-dheere un dono ke beech bhi distance badne laga. Dono ke beech aksar ladai hoti thi. Dono hi jaisa jeevan saathi chahte they waisa unhe nahi mila. Tera papa jo har mahfil ki jaan hua karta tha. Woh dheere-dheere ander hi ander ghutne laga aur bahut pareshaan rahne laga. Usko iss tension mein dekh kar humne  usko divorce lene ki bhi salah di. Par woh decide nahi kar pa raha tha ki woh kya kare.  
Ek baar ki baat hai. Tumhaare papa office ke kaam se Bangalore gaye hue they. Wahin tumhaare pita ki pahli mulakaat Anjali se hui. Anjali Vedehi ki maa. Tumhaare papa Bangalore mein Anjali ke ghar par paying guest ban kar rah rahe they Anjali ke pita tumhaare papa ke office mein hi kaam karte they. Tumhaare papa ko Bangalore mein kuch 4-5 mahino tak rahna tha itne lambe samay tak bahar ka khana jara muskil kaam tha aur tumhaare papa ko khana bana na nahi aata tha aise mein Anjali ke papa ne tere papa ko apne ghar par as a paying guest rakh liya.
Anjali Ph.D kar rahi thi. Anjali ek south Indian ladki thi. South Indian log apne bachcho ko dance aur music ki bhi shiksha dete hain. Anjali bhi bharatnatyam aur karnatic music mein nipun thi. Bahut meetha gaathi aur bolti thi. Bahut swadisht khana banati thi. Maa Annapurna ki jaise us par kuch khas kripa ho. Anjali bahut milansaar bhi thi. Anjali mein har woh baat thi jo tere papa ne apne jeewan shaathi mein chaahi thi. Anjali ke swabhav ne jald hi tere papa ka dil jeet liya. Anjali ki baaten aur uska swabhav tumhaare papa ke ghav par marham ka kaam karne lage. Tere papa ka nature toh tha hi bahut achcha unke shaadi suda hone ke bawjood Anjali bhi tumhaare papa ko dil hi dil mein chahne lagi thi.
Tabhi ek accident mein Anjali ke pita ki maut ho gayi. Unki saari property par uske chacho ne dhoke se kabja kar liya.  Aise mein Anjali ki maa ke paas Bangalore ke us makaan ke allawa kuch aur nahi bacha. Aise mein tere papa ne Anjali aur uski maa ki bahut madad ki aur Anjali ke papa ki job Anjali ko dilwa di. Isi dauraan tere papa aur Anjali ke beech kuch ghanist ta ho gayi aur kisi kamjoor ghadi mein un dono se ek bhul ho gayi.  
Tumhaare papa delhi aa gaye. Shayad mann hi mann usne decide kar liye ki woh tumhaari maa se divorce le lega. Lekin yahan aakar use pata chala ki tumhaari maa pregnant hai. Tumhaari maa six months pregnant thi aur tumhaare papa kariban chaar mahino ke baad wapas aa rahe they. Tumhaare maa ne jaate samay tumhaare papa ko nahi bataya tha ki woh pregnant hai.
  Fir tum ho gayi aur usne anajali ka khayal apne dimag se nikal diya. Tumhaari wajah se tumhaari maa ke saath ek nayi shuruwat karne ke liye apne aap ko tyar karne laga. Lekin tumhaari maa aur kutte ki poonch kabhi seedhi nahi ho sakti. Tumhaari maa mein tumhaare aane ke baad bhi koi change nahi aaya. Aakhirkaar tumhaare papa ne hathiyar dal diye air apni kismet aur tumhari maa ke saath samjhauta kar liya. Usne apne aap ko kitabon mein kho diya. Usne ab ek chuppi si saadh li. Ab ya tumhaare saath khelta ya apni books mein gusa rahata.
Jab tum dedh saal ki hui toh tumhaare papa ko doobara Bangalore jaana pada.wahan jaakar use pata chala ki uske aane ke baad Anjali aur uski maa ko bahut kuch sahna pada. Asal mein wahan Anjali pregnant ho chuki thi. Kyon ki woh tere papa ko pyar karti thi isliye usne iss bachche ko janam diya. Jab tere papa ko saari baat ka pata chala toh tere papa ne wahan ke  ek mandir mein Anjali se shaadi kar li.
Tabse tumhaare papa teen hafte delhi mein aur ek hafta Bangalore mein rahte hain. Ye baat mujhe bhi pata nahi thi. Do saal pahle jab meri tabiyat bahut kharab thi aur main marne se pahle balaji ke darshan karna chahti thi. Us samay tere paap ne mujhe bataya ki maa maine aaj tak tujhse ek baat chupa kar rakhi hai aur tere marne se pahle main tujhe batana chahta hoon. Aur fir woh mujhe Anjali ke paas le gaya. Tab maine pahli baar Anjali aur apne pote-potiyon ko dekha.
Anjali ne un aath-das dino mein meri woh seva ki itna aadar satkaar kiya, jiske liye main hamesha tadpti thi. Usne un aath-das dino mein mere saas hone ke ahsaas ko pura kar diya. Aur maine usi pal Anjali aur apne bête ko maaf kar diya. Agar Anjali na hoti toh mere bête ka ye jeevan toh barbaad ho chukka tha. Usne mere bête ko barbaad hone se bacha liya.
Ab main tere upar chodti hoon ki chaaho toh ye sach sabko bata do ya fir jaisa chal raha hai use waise hi chalne do. Maithili dadi ki  baat sunkar apne ghar wapas aa gayi. Papa pahle hi ghar pahunch chuke they. Anjali ne papa ko phone karke bata diya tha ki Maithili ko sab kuch pata chal chukka hai. Mujhe ghar par aise dekh kar maa ne poocha ki tu toh 20 dino ke baad aane wali thi fir pahle kaise aa gayi.
Maine kaha ki papa ki permission nahi lit hi. Isliye bura lag raha tha. Papa I am sorry kahkar main papa se lipat gayi. Aur rone lagi. Papa ne mujhe gale se laga liya. Main aur papa jaante they ki mujhe kyon bura lag raha tha.

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